殯葬禮儀 Funeral Etiquette

 

如何著裝

 

在您參加葬禮儀式之前,請找出您的著裝規範,這樣會讓您穿著的更得體;如果您無法確定,那麼請著正裝以表示對先人及其家屬的一份尊重,但這並不意味著您必須要穿黑色衣服(事實上,有些家庭指定在葬禮儀式上不能有黑色),只是請盡量避免穿顏色過於鮮豔的衣服。對於男士來說,一套保守的西裝與一條領帶通常比較安全穩妥;而對於女性來講,則可以選擇傳統的裙子或褲子搭配素雅簡約的襯衫。

 

當您準備參加一場葬禮儀式時,您可能會發現自己有很多的不確定:該怎樣著裝、該怎樣講話、該做什麼,我們將一些關於殯葬儀式的傳統禮儀編成一個簡單的指南,以幫助您更得體地表達您的敬重。

 

宗教信仰和傳統習俗

 

在不同的社區都會有不同的宗教信仰和傳統習俗,事先考慮到這些值得留意的事項往往是有益的,我們可以回答您所需要了解的問題,提供詳細具體的指南供您參考。

 

 

葬禮儀式是抒發情感的時間,悲傷的情緒也是在這個過程中的一部分,因此請不用對您和先人家屬開始哭泣而感到不舒服;然而如果您發現自己極度哀傷,那麼請盡量迴避與先人家屬接觸,避免為他們增添心理上的壓力。

 

與家屬的問候

 

當您抵達後,請與他們握手或給予一個擁抱以示慰問,請不要覺得應該避免談論先人,因為交流通常正是幫助家屬治愈身心這一過程的起點。 

 

該說些什麼話

 

用您發自肺腑的話語來表達您的緬懷之情,一句簡單卻極富意義的“我對您親人的離世致以哀悼”或“願我的思念和祈禱能夠傳達給您和您的家人”總是能適時地安慰先人家屬。

 

避免說哪些話

 

不要問及先人的死因,如果家人想討論這個問題,他們會起一個頭;不要說例如“我之前已經經歷過相同的事”這樣的話語,避免給予非主動的建議,或無意中說出會降低他們失去至親的重要性。

 

如何致以敬意

 

在瞻仰遺容的儀式中,如果您希望的話可以通過瞻仰先人的遺容來表達敬意,請花一點時間來為先人默禱;家人可能會將您請上靈前,您也可以自行上前。但是瞻仰遺容本身並不是強制性的,請選擇妥善的方法來表達您對先人的敬意。

 

如何行事

 

在向先人家屬致以慰問後,與前來探望先人的其他親友彼此交流也是一個理想的選擇,請不要覺得您的逗留時間是否合適,無論時間長短,您的在場對家屬來說都是一件有意義的事。

 

簽名登記

 

請記得簽您的全名登記方便家人事後確認,您也可以把一些其他信息——例如工作、社團或學校等信息一起登記。

 

鮮花與禮物

 

致送鮮花、奠儀或是紀念禮品對於失去親人的家屬來說有不同尋常的意義。當言語不足以表達您的慰問時,最簡單的禮品也可以表達您對先人的緬懷,為家人帶來極大的安慰。

 

請關閉您的手機

 

這一點應該無需多做詮釋。如果您隨身攜帶手機,請在葬禮儀式中將手機關機。

 

When attending a visitation or funeral, you might find yourself uncertain of what you should wear, what to say, or what to do. We've put together a short guide to the basics of funeral home etiquette to help you pay your respects with courtesy and consideration.

What to Wear
Try to find out the dress code before you attend, so that you can be sure you'll fit in and look appropriate. If you aren't sure, simply try to dress in a conservative way that shows respect for the family and other mourners. This doesn't necessarily mean you must wear black (in fact, some families specify "no black" for their services), but try to avoid overly bright colors. For men, a suit and a conservative tie is usually a safe bet. Women should generally wear a conservative dress, skirt, or pants with a tasteful blouse.

 

Religious & Ethnic Customs
Traditions and customs differ among various communities, ethnic groups and religions, and it's often helpful to ask beforehand about any special considerations you need to take into account. We can answer many of your questions, and can also point you toward resources that offer specific and detailed guides.

 

Emotions
A funeral is an emotional time, and grieving is a natural part of the healing process. Don't feel uncomfortable if you or the bereaved begins to cry. However, if you find yourself becoming extremely upset, it is kinder to excuse yourself to avoid increasing the strain on the family.

 

Greeting the Family
Upon arrival, approach the family and express your sympathy with an embrace or by offering your hands. Don't feel that you should avoid talking about the person who has died...in fact, talking can help the grieving process to begin.

 

What to Say
Express your sympathy in your own words, however it feels right to you. Kind words about the loved one who has passed are always appropriate, and a simple "I'm sorry for your loss" or "My thoughts and prayers are with you" can be meaningful and comforting for the bereaved.

 

What Not to Say
Don't ask the cause of death; if the family wants to discuss it, let them bring it up. Avoid giving unsolicited advice, or making comments that might unintentionally diminish the importance of the loss, such as "I've been through this before."

 

Paying Respect
At a service with an open casket, it's customary to show your respect by viewing the deceased and, if you wish, spending a few moments in silent prayer. The family may escort you to the casket, or you might approach on your own. Viewing the deceased is not mandatory, however, and you should act according to what is comfortable to you.

 

How to Act
After you've offered your condolences to the family, it's perfectly appropriate to engage in quiet conversation with friends and other associates of the deceased who attend the visitation. Don't feel that you have to stay longer than you feel comfortable; your presence means a lot to the family, no matter how long or short the visit.

 

Signing the Register
Be sure to add yourself to the register book, using your full name so that the family can identify you in the future. It's also helpful to add information about how you knew the deceased-through work, social clubs, school, etc.

 

Flowers and Gifts
Sending flowers, making a donation, or giving a memorial gift are all meaningful gestures to let the bereaved know that they are in your thoughts. The simplest of tributes can be of great comfort to the family, and can express your sympathy when words just aren't enough.

 

Turn Off Your Cellphone
This one should go without saying. If you choose to bring your phone into the funeral home, take a moment to make sure you've turned it off.